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College and School Jokes
1. The Teacher and Student (1/24/2010)
Student:"Professor, I did the best I could on this test. I really don't think I deserve a zero." Teacher:"Neither do I."
Student:"Professor, I did the best I could on this test. I really don't think I deserve a zero." Teacher:"Neither do I."
2. Fried Chicken (8/23/2009)
In class the teacher showed pictures of various birds. Then he asked one of the students, "What kind of bird do you like best, Jack?"
In class the teacher showed pictures of various birds. Then he asked one of the students, "What kind of bird do you like best, Jack?"
3. Warning (8/13/2009)
Several weeks after our son began his freshman year at Alma College in Michigan, my husband and I decided to visit him.
Several weeks after our son began his freshman year at Alma College in Michigan, my husband and I decided to visit him.
4. Physical Training (8/12/2009)
The physical training instrutar was drilling a platoon of soldiers. "I want every man to lie on his back ,put his legs in the air and move them as though he were riding a bicycle ." he explained."Now begin!"
The physical training instrutar was drilling a platoon of soldiers. "I want every man to lie on his back ,put his legs in the air and move them as though he were riding a bicycle ." he explained."Now begin!"
5. The Essence Of Things (8/10/2009)
Wondering why my niece, Charlotte, was returning to college to get a master's in philosophy, I asked, "What can you do with a degree like that?"
Wondering why my niece, Charlotte, was returning to college to get a master's in philosophy, I asked, "What can you do with a degree like that?"
6. Crazy fan (7/8/2009)
After inflating the playground balls, our school custodian, a classical music fanatic, had an odd habit of writing the names of famous composers on them.
After inflating the playground balls, our school custodian, a classical music fanatic, had an odd habit of writing the names of famous composers on them.
7. A suspect (7/8/2009)
We were listening to a lecture on psychic phenomena in our Comparative Religions course. Our instructor told us about a woman who contacted police working on a missing persons case. "She gave them eerily detailed instructions on where to find the body,"
We were listening to a lecture on psychic phenomena in our Comparative Religions course. Our instructor told us about a woman who contacted police working on a missing persons case. "She gave them eerily detailed instructions on where to find the body,"
8. I'm Trying to Stop It (7/4/2009)
"No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I am trying to stop it."
"No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I am trying to stop it."
9. A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson on logic. (7/4/2009)
"Here is the situation," she said. "a man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yellin g for help. His wife hears the commotion
"Here is the situation," she said. "a man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yellin g for help. His wife hears the commotion
10. Cadaver sing fight song (11/26/2008)
A Chapel Hill area mortician had a new apprentice who was learning the embalming ropes. He walked into the embalming room where a cadaver was lying on the table. Thinking he knew enough now to begin the procedure without his boss.
A Chapel Hill area mortician had a new apprentice who was learning the embalming ropes. He walked into the embalming room where a cadaver was lying on the table. Thinking he knew enough now to begin the procedure without his boss.
11. Evolution of Mathematics (11/26/2008)
THE EVOLUTION OF MATHEMATICS TRAINING OVER THE PAST FIFTY YEARS, Teaching Math in 1950: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?
THE EVOLUTION OF MATHEMATICS TRAINING OVER THE PAST FIFTY YEARS, Teaching Math in 1950: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?
12. Little Johnny at the 1st grade concert (11/26/2008)
The 1st grade concert is fast approaching and Johnny has stillnot decided what he will do. Little Mary is going to do a pianosolo, Timmy will recite a poem.
Page: [1] [2] The 1st grade concert is fast approaching and Johnny has stillnot decided what he will do. Little Mary is going to do a pianosolo, Timmy will recite a poem.
