Holiday and Travel Jokes-Really Short Funny Jokes.
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   Holiday and Travel Jokes
1. The Milkmaid (7/11/2011)
   A country maid was walking to the town to sell some milk, which she carried in a pitcher on her head. As she went along, she said to herself, `I have already fifty eggs at home; with the money which I get for my milk I will buy fifty more.
2. Get the kid (6/6/2011)
   their 70s, 80s, or 90s. So when something has to be moved, lifted or loaded, they yell,`Get the kid.`
3. It's a Puzzlement (6/5/2011)
   I asked a colleague of mine how he liked the shirt his daughter had given him as a gift. `The color and the design are nice,` he said. `But the sleeves are three inches too long.`
4. The one nearest the exit (5/29/2011)
   A newspaper organized a contest for the best answer to the question: `If a fire broke out in the Louvre, and if you could only save one painting, which one would you carry out?`
5. Do not throw good things away (5/27/2011)
   A man was going to the house of some rich person. As he went along the road, he saw a box of good apples at the side of the road. He said, `I do not want to eat those apples; for the rich man will give me much food; he will give me very nice food to eat.` Then he took the apples and threw them away into the dust.
6. They didnt last year (5/25/2011)
   One stupid guy reads an ad about a vacation cruise that costs only $ 100.After he signs up and pays, the travel agent hits him with a bat, knocks him unconscious and throws him out the back door into the river.
7. what's puberty£¿ (5/9/2011)
   One evening£¬in the midst of dinner preparation£¬our 10 yearold daughter asked£¬¡°Mom my£¬what's puberty£¿¡±My wife was rushed at the moment£¬so she suggested that Peggy look up the word in the dictionary£¬after which they could talk about it.
8. Safe and Sound (4/7/2011)
   A group of friends who went deer hunting separated into pairs for the day. That night, one hunter returned alone, staggeringunder a huge buck .
9. I got to Costa Rica for my first vacation in five (3/21/2011)
   Today, I got to Costa Rica for my first vacation in five years. I immediately rented a scooter for the week after checking into my prepaid, no refunds, hotel. On the way back from the rental agency I hit a pothole and broke my leg and ripped the skin off my foot.
10. A Bad News (3/19/2011)
   The doctor says, `I have some good news and some bad news.`The man says, `OK, give me the good news first.`The doctor says, `The good news is, you have 24 hours to live.`
11. Idiot (3/19/2011)
   An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me? Son: No.
12. Wrong Number (3/19/2011)
   teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up. `Wow!,` said her father, `That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?`
13. Double Mistakes (3/19/2011)
   Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl? It's a girl. She's my daughter.Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father.
14. The Biggest Lie (3/19/2011)
   Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room. The teacher says, `Why are you arguing?` One boy answers, `We found a ten dollar bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie.`
15. Second Language (3/19/2011)
   family of mice were surprised by a big cat. Father Mouse jumped and said, `Bow-wow!` The cat ran away. `What was that, Father?` asked Baby Mouse. `Well, son, that's why it's important to learn a second language.`
16. Two Pounds of Plums (3/18/2011)
   Mother: I sent my little boy for two pounds of plums and you gave him a pound and a half. Shopkeeper: My scales are all right, madam. Have you weighted your little boy?
17. The Toast Is Burned (3/18/2011)
   young couple were becoming anxious about their four-year-old son, who had not yet talked. They took him to specialists, but the doctors found nothing wrong with him. Then one morning at breakfast the boy suddenly blurted, `Mom, the toast is burned.`
18. The Goldfish and the Cat (3/18/2011)
   Little Amy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was doing, he politely asked, `What are you up to there, Amy?`
19. The Age and Daydreaming (3/18/2011)
   The teacher noticed that Johnny had been daydreaming for a long time. She decided to get his attention. `Johnny,` she said, `If the world is 25,000 miles around and eggs are sixty cents a dozen, how old am I?
20. I wasn't listening (3/18/2011)
   I don't know.` the little girl answered.`You don't know? But you were reading aloud, so you must know.`
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